Sunday, March 29, 2009

So there's that dream...

My reality is different. Judah may want his mama for certain things, but bedtime is clearly dada's department. Moments ago I tried it. The result, a clear scream of desperation followed by "I love you dada...I love you dada...I love you dada." He's smart. He may have just turned 20 months, but he knows how to work us. This hurts my feelings. I'd like to be all big and tough and giving and ONLY see the positives...and there are MANY positives. For instance, that Judah has an amazing dad. A dad whose superior olfactory senses detect potty before I do and who has NEVER paused before changing Jude's diaper and who has never tried to pass him off. A dad who knows instinctively the hunger and sleepy level of Judah at all times. A dad who takes pride in the fact that his son is SO attached to him and has worked hard to earn it. A dad who cringes at the thought of a father who would NOT want to change a diaper or not want to take care of any of his child's needs for that matter. A dad who LOVES helping out his "Little Dude" and whose favorite thing is making him laugh (although, with Jude, this is NOT a difficult task). Well, the positives...I guess THEY are just TOO easy, because I'm the man out and I'm pouting about it tonight.

9 comments:

Eastiopians said...

I feel ya...those things hurt even though you are happy for their relationship. It's also a phase to some extent. There will be times when he needs you more than anything else in the world, and then there will be other times or situations where he needs his dad most. At the same time, we watch those phases. If Eva only wants me to sleep with her, then we switch off every other night (me then Jon, me then Jon, etc.) so that she doesn't get too extreme with wanting only one of us over the other. She will cry the 1st and maybe even 2nd time when Jon tries to put her to bed, but by the 3rd or 4th time she is asking for him when it's my turn. Very silly kiddos. So we both share everything...bath-time, taking her to "school", bed-time, etc. as much as we can. That may not be of any help to you, so just know that you are certainly not alone and that Judah loves his mommy!!! :)

Theresa

courtney rose said...

I'm glad you posted this one. So many emotions involved in being parents, yes? I hope you were able to scarf down some tamales to help turn that frown upside down (pizza does it for me)....

Melissa said...

I can totally relate to this post..we've only had Ezra home for 5 weeks but he is absolutely more attached to my husband..in fact I have had more than one "moment" over it! Just like you, I have had to step back and realize what a beautiful thing it is to have such an amazing husband and to see such a beautiful connection. Hang in there MOM!!! I'm rootin' for us..ha!

Lindy Young said...

Oh, all mamas have a story like this. For the longest time Dessi wouldn't even say 'mama.' She learned how to call the CAT before she said mama. But most of her playmates are Daddy Fans right now; I think it's just a phase of the age.

BUT, I am the putter-to-sleeper. We used to insist on taking turns, and although she eventually stopped doing the howling thing as soon as he walked in the bedroom with her at night, she would almost always end up crying herself to sleep at night in the end. We finally decided, she's such an easygoing baby, why should we not indulge this one request? So we kind of blew it off, and now Eric puts her to sleep only if she's totally exhausted and ready for it, this way they start to have lots of successful sleepytime moments and we figure eventually he will be her favorite on that matter, too! :)

Rebecca said...

Eli is all about his dad right now too. I'm pretty sure they'll go back and forth for a while. It'll be our turn again soon. Right?

Nicole and Andy said...

Just wait until I come back and I have him saying I love Auntie I love Auntie I love Auntie...:)

susan said...

Tommy is a great Daddy!
Nicole you are the funny one!
Love you all,
Mom

Lea said...

How do I sign up for one of those Dad's that change the poopy diapers? :P

Nana said...

You have great friends and lots of original support-so who needs Dr Spock anyway? I love hearing good things about my first born---but you are wise enough to see the game. It is all about giving what Judah wants after you have led him to believe that he wants what you want for him. Bedtime rituals can help, so he anticipates your actions and Tommy's actions, so he won't confuse them. Feel better, good luck.