I've been toying with the idea of dieting. I'm honest about it. I'm just not ready. I love food. I love wine. A lot.
This does not mean that I don't realize I have a tad of extraness. I deal with this by repeatedly reminding myself that beauty can have a little extraness...AND be equally as beautiful. Ok, so sometimes I go to dark, shallow places to remind myself of this.
I was at work observing the kids playing on the playground, feeling very zen. When I noticed in the distance how pretty a fellow teacher was. Here's where I admit what a huge jerk I am (remind yourself, as you rightly judge me, that you sometimes have thoughts that don't make you the most proud). What I noticed is that she was VERY pretty, healthy looking. How had I not noticed before? I processed the info, "see, she is absolutely beautiful and her tummy may even have SLIGHTLY more extra than mine. You can have extra and be perfect. I don't need to diet."
Yes, that was my thought. I'm pathetic. I admit it.
After this sick incident, we had 3 weeks off of work for winter break. I returned this week to the obvious: She's pregnant.
Yes, I was feeling better about MY body by comparing it to a pregnant woman. Sad.
But, here's the interesting part: Not one cell of my body envied her. Not one little cell.